I believe in the importance of setting realistic goals, and in the process of trying to bring a singular goal into fruition, that goal of “realistic” started becoming a little blurred.
My personal challenge (and detriment, if you want to be so callous as to call out my failure before I even try) is breaking open my introverted shell. In “real” life, it takes a good month or five for me to be comfortable enough to even tell you my middle name. That’s no exaggeration. I have best friends that only know the initial. Discussing personal feelings and perspectives deeper than the weather takes time and trust that can either instantaneously burst with a bonding moment over tequila, or a force of coercion…neither of which end well. On the natural basis, it literally takes 2 months before I feel I’ve reached my comfort zone with anyone to cross over that line of personable/personal.
Which is why I have chosen a pen name for my relatively-anonymous blogging, so I can persuade that depth to enter into the craft I’m trying to groom.
So, as I peruse all of my online personas and handles, trying to figure out which of these would be most fitting and would still ensure the cloak of anonymity, I realize that none of them will work. A new one must be created. So I choose between names that mean something and nothing and come up with Ann Alexander.
Common enough, perhaps familiar enough, but also an arm’s length of where I am.
Until that day I decide to google the name and learn that my pen is the name of a ship that was taken down in the 1800’s by a sperm whale.
That’s okay, though. I’m keeping my baby.